1. Close Shave America, Close Shave Barbasol.

    Instead of cliche’ “White Outs” or failed “Stripe Outs”, and since the game will be on the BTN, I proclaim the game shall be a BARBASOL-OUT. All fans are encouraged to wear flannel, drive 18-wheelers, and lather their bodies in shaving cream prior to the game.

    Don’t forget your Barbasol!

    I shall now return to my bedroom where my out-of-my-league wife has prepared me pancakes late at night.

  2. on the bright side: nobody’s storming the court any more so at least that has been fixed…

  3. I am going to make my detractors happy with this statement (all three of them: GF Dave, Engel/Mystery Administrative Poster, and 4guards):

    I am resigning for the season from the Scoop. It’s amazing how much time one can waste on the internet. I bet many people end up divorced, obese, and unemployed because of the time they spend on sports blogs; I won’t be one of them.

    This time, I am not playing the Urban Meyer card and coming back after a short hiatus. You have my word; I have offered a specific timespan.

    The next time I post, I’ll look forward to sharing in the optimism of a new season with Maurice Creek at full strength, a junior leader in all-Big 10 Verdell Jones, and stronger, tougher, more confident versions of Watty, Jordan, T.P., and Elston. It is beyond obvious to me that we will challenge for a tourney spot and finish towards the top of the conference.

    Until then, I’ll take solace in the fact that my Huskies are playing well again, and I will look forward to the Hoosiers upsetting someone in the Big 10 tourney.

    So long, all.

  4. ^ Translation: “I don’t have anything to say and as always I need some attention. Can anybody please give me some attention? Also, I am not resigning.”

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